The Phantom of the Dojo?
by Talhonjik
Summary: A crossover of Ranma and the Phantom of the Opera...well, kind of... Akane´s school does the play of PotO, and guess who get the lead roles... Here´s Chapter 6! R&R!!!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaim: I do not own the characters in Ranma ½ , but Erik is MINE, ALL MINE, MUAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! No, just kidding, unfortunately I do not own The Phantom of the opera either ... sniff ...  
  
THE PHANTOM OF THE ... DOJO?  
  
"Ranma Saotome, prepare to DIIEEEE!!"  
  
Ranma quickly dodged a blow from Ryoga´s umbrella. "Oh, hey, Ryoga," he said. "How´s it going?"  
  
Ryoga dislodged his umbrella from the crack it had made in the wall and roared as he prepared to attack him again.  
  
Akane stamped her foot impatiently. "Come on, Ranma!" she called. "We´ll be late!"  
  
Ranma leaped back up onto the fence. "Gotta go, Ryoga," he called down at him. "Bye!"  
  
Ryoga stared after him. "Ranma Saotome," he growled, "I will have my revenge on you!"  
  
"Akane! Akane!" Her friends came running towards her as they approached the school.  
  
"Oh, hi, guys," she smiled.  
  
"Akane! Come and see!" they cried, dragging her in and towards the announcement board. "What?" Akane asked.  
  
"Look!" they replied, pointing to a paper on the board. Akane stood on her toes, trying to see what they were pointing at over the heads of the crowd around the board.  
  
"Look! It´s the casting for the school play!" someone exclaimed in front of her.  
  
´School play,´ Akane thought. "Oh yeah, we were doing some musical, weren´t we...´  
  
She finally managed to push her way through the crowd.  
  
She froze.  
  
There was her name, right at the top!  
  
Her friends joined her. "You are so lucky, Akane," they said to her. "You get the lead role! You´ve been cast as Christine!"  
  
"Christine?" Akane said, puzzled.  
  
"Yeah; you know, Christine Daaé in the Phantom of the Opera?"  
  
Oh, god.  
  
The truth dawned on her. "Y-You mean I have to sing? In front of the whole school?!" she practically shrieked.  
  
"What´s up, klutz-girl?" Ranma appeared behind her.  
  
"She´s been cast in one of the lead roles in the school musical!" her friends told him.  
  
Ranma grinned. "Cool! I´ll make sure I get a seat in the front row! It´ll be a laugh-"  
  
Akane wipped out her mallet, ready to send Ranma into orbit, but her friends stopped her.  
  
"Not quite, Ranma. Look at the notice."  
  
Ranma looked.  
  
  
  
Christine Daaé: Akane Tendo  
  
Raoul:  
  
Ranma fell to his knees.  
  
Raoul: Ranma Saotome.  
  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!"  
  
His scream was heard all the way to the Tendo residence.  
  
Soun put down his cup and looked at Genma. "Ah ... it sounds like Ranma has found out about the musical," he said.  
  
The panda, Genma, held up a sign. the teachers were really very cooperative when I suggested their casting Ranma as Raoul  
  
Soun nodded, and stared out at the garden. "Yes ... it´s amazing how co- operative people are when dealing with a giant, angry panda who communicates with signs," he remarked.  
  
If this doesnt bring them together I´ll eat my sign, Genma wrote, happily.  
  
The man and the panda laughed the happy laugh of two fathers plotting to get their children to marry.  
  
"But you can´t DO THIS TO ME!!" Ranma cried, dropping to his knees in front of the Drama teacher, Mr Huriko. "Please; I´ll do anything, even stay awake in class, but please, don´t make me get up on stage and SING!"  
  
"No, Ranma, I´m sorry," the teacher replied, trying to loosen Ranma´s desperate grip on his ankles. "You´ve been cast as Raoul and that´s final. Besides, most people would give anything for such a wonderful part!"  
  
"Then let them have it!!" Ranma shouted. "I don´t want to play Raoul!"  
  
"That´s enough, Ranma!" the teacher said, sternly. "Please go and stand in the hall!" Ranma picked himself off the floor. "But -" he made one last desperate attempt. "Now, Ranma." There was a definite sharp edge to the teacher´s voice by now.  
  
Ranma trudged out, only just remembering to pick up his water buckets on the way.  
  
"Nihao, Ranma!"  
  
"Oh, great," Ranma muttered. "Just when I thought my day couldn´t get any worse..."  
  
Shampoo came down the hall and stopped in front of him. "Why you always out in hall in school, Ranma?" she asked. "And always with bucket..."  
  
"It doesn´t matter, Shampoo," he said. "What are you doing here, anyway?"  
  
Shampoo smiled. "Shampoo hear airen be in play; Shampoo come be in play too!"  
  
Ranma gulped. This meant trouble wasn´t far off. "Uh, Shampoo, I´m not sure it works quite like that ..."  
  
But Shampoo had already opened the door into the classroom. Ranma heard voices, them raised voices, and then a definite BONG, and Shampoo came out, slamming the door behind her, muttering something in Chinese.  
  
Ranma couldn´t help asking, although he knew it would probably make it worse. "Uh ... so ... what did he say, Shampoo?"  
  
Shampoo turned to him. She looked extremely angry. "Teacher man say Shampoo no get big role!" she fumed. "He say Shampoo sing chorus or be understudy or no be in play!" She wrapped herself around Ranma´s neck. "But you no worry, airen," she said, hugging him. "Shampoo find way to get big role in play! Shampoo must go now," she added. "Must go talk to great- grandmother ..."  
  
Ranma rubbed his neck, trying to get the circulation started again. He found himself wondering exactly how much Shampoo would do to get a leading role in the play. A lot, knowing her.  
  
The door to the classroom opened. "Who was that?" the boy, one of Ranma´s classmates, said, staring down the hall after the rapidly disappearing Shampoo. Ranma chose not to answer. "Anyway, I have to go get the nurse ... she knocked out Mr Huriko ..." the boy said, heading off in the direction of the school nurse´s office. Ranma groaned. This was going to be a very difficult play to do.  
  
  
  
A/N: OK, wasn´t that BRILLIANT?!? No, maybe not ... But anyway, I´ll write another chapter as soon as I get your reviews, or not, if you think it´s a stupid story and I should have a chandelier dropped on my head for writing something so dumb ... OK I´ll shut up now, please review, PEACE! 


	2. Chapter 2

OK, people, here´s chapter two! Enjoy!!!  
  
  
  
Chapter 2  
  
"But I don´t wanna go!" Ranma moaned, as his father dragged him along the ground towards the school. Akane followed, marvelling at the way they managed to keep up an argument even though one of them was a panda and the other was being dragged along the dusty road.  
  
Ranma you´re in this play and that´s final, his father wrote.  
  
There had been a loud argument between him and Ranma the night before, as a result of which they were still both covered in plasters. Ranma had pestered the Drama teacher all day at school that morning, and had quite bluntly refused to turn up at the practise that evening. But at that point Genma had stepped in, and was now pulling the kicking, shouting boy up the steps towards the school.  
  
´Boy, he really doesn´t want to do this´, Akane thought, as Ranma bit his father´s paw in one last desperate attempt to escape. Genma picked him up and slung him over his shoulder.  
  
Genma opened the door to the Drama class with his one free paw. He plopped Ranma down at his desk. He looked up. What are you staring at? He "signed" to the teacher and the other students. He opened the door again and went out.  
  
Mr Huriko stared at the door. "Um ... right ..." he turned back to the class. "Well ... now Saotome and Tendo are here, perhaps we can begin by discussing the play - Mr Saotome, please get down from the window, it´s locked, you can´t get out through it. Now ... does anyone know what the Phantom of the Opera is about?"  
  
A few hands went up.  
  
"Yes -"  
  
BANG.  
  
The door flew open.  
  
"Nihao, mister teacher man!" Shampoo said, happily. "Shampoo here be in play!" Mr Huriko sweat-dropped. "Please, miss, I already told you -"  
  
"Is okay Shampoo no get big role!" the Chinese girl smiled, innocently. "Shampoo come be understudy, yes?"  
  
Mr Huriko opened his mouth, rubbed his hand over the still-obvious bump on his head from his last encounter with Shampoo, and smiled weakly. "Well, this is supposed to be a play done by the school ... but of course we´re happy to accept anyone who´d like to take part in it," he quickly added.  
  
Shampoo beamed. She took the desk beside Ranma´s, moved it right up to his, and sat there, looking quite happy, seemingly not noticing Akane´s glaring.  
  
"Now ... the story line? Anyone?"  
  
BANG.  
  
Again, the door flew open.  
  
Ranma sunk down in his seat. ´Oh, no, not him ANYONE but him ...´  
  
Mr Huriko beamed. "Ah, the third lead role is here! Welcome, Kuno."  
  
"To BE or NOT to be ... indeed that is the question," Kuno declared, dramatically. "And indeed, seeing as my sweet Akane has been cast as the radiant Christine in the immortal piece The Phantom of the Opera ... I have decided to BE ..." he knelt before her at her desk, producing a buquet of roses from somewhere in his kendo robes, "your Angel of Music."  
  
"Go AWAY, Kuno," Akane growled.  
  
"Yes, that´s right," Mr Huriko nodded. "Kuno will be taking the title role as the Phantom himself, with Saotome as Raoul, and Tendo, as Kuno says, as Christine." He paused. "Kuno, if you would take your seat ..."  
  
"Ah ..." Kuno turned to Ranma, a look of disgust on his face. "Saotome, pray remove your unsightly self from that seat, so as I may be seated beside my sweet Christine."  
  
Ranma poked his tongue out at him. "In your dreams, buster."  
  
Kuno straightened up. "Are you challenging the mighty Kuno, Saotome?"  
  
Ranma stood up to face him. "Maybe. I´m sure not giving you my seat."  
  
"Oh, shut up, you two!" Akane snapped, angrily.  
  
"Stay outta this, Akane," Ranma said, absent-mindedly.  
  
Kuno seemed to grow even taller. "How dare you speak like that to my sweet Akane?!" he thundered. "Have you no respect?"  
  
"You no talk like that to Shampoo airen!" Kuno recieved a flying kick in the back of the head.  
  
"Saotome! Kuno! Miss Shampoo! Please settle this after the practise," Mr Huriko said, loudly. "Kuno, please find another seat."  
  
Kuno got to his feet, rubbing his head, and gave Ranma one last glare. "You have not heard the last of this, Saotome."  
  
"What a jerk," Ranma muttered as the older boy made his way to a free desk.  
  
Mr Huriko was beginning to look annoyed. "Now, if everyone has quite finished clowning around ... May I have an answer to my question? Does anyone know the plot of the Phantom of the Opera?"  
  
Everyone, including Mr Huriko, glanced expectantly at the door, but no- one else barged in.  
  
" Well, it seems everyone is, at last, here," he said. "So? Anyone? Miss Tendo?"  
  
"Um ... well... the Phantom of the Opera is originally a French story," Akane said. "It´s about an opera house in Paris, where a young soprano, Christine, is recieving secret music lessons from a mysterious voice she calls the Angel of Music. But then a childhood friend of hers, Raoul, turns up, and begins courting her. The Phantom doesn´t like this, and tries to get Raoul to go away, but he´s stupid and stubborn-" she saw, out of the corner of her eye, that Ranma shot her an evil glare, but she ignored it, "- and stays on. Eventually, the Phantom kidnaps Christine and takes her down into the basement of the opera house, but in the end, Raoul comes down and rescues her, and they marry. This musical, composed by Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber, a British composer, is based on that story."  
  
"Show-off," Ranma hissed. Akane ignored this.  
  
"Very good, Tendo," Mr Huriko nodded. "That´s quite right. This is one of Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber´s most famous musicals, and not for no reason. The story is full of mystery and romance, which is reflected very well in the music itself. Please don´t think I can´t see you yawning, Saotome. I´ll let you listen to some of the best bits now, and we´ll begin reading over the script at our next practise." He took out a CD. "Now, we´ll begin with the overture ..."  
  
  
  
"Okay, see ya, Kuno!" Ranma leaped over the boy, who was lying sprawled in the dirt.  
  
"Next time, Saotome ..." Kuno growled, spitting out mud, but Ranma had already run off. Kuno had, naturally, challenged him after the practise, and Ranma had, naturally, defeated him again.  
  
Ranma ran along the fence, whistling one of the tunes they had been listening to at the practise. The music hadn´t been too bad, actually, he had to admit. But he was still going to have to find some way to get out of doing this ...  
  
Ranma leaped up, almost without noticing it, as a deadly bandana came flying his way. "Hey, Ryoga," he said, jumping down to where the boy was standing. "Long time no see. I see you haven´t lost your way out of town yet this week, and it´s what, wow, Wednesday..." Ryoga roared, and aimed a furious blow at Ranma´s head, but Ranma was already out of the way.  
  
Ryoga calmed himself down. "So ... word has it you´re in a play, Ranma."  
  
Ranma made a face. "Yeah, but don´t think I´m telling you where or when it´s on so you can come and laugh at me, pig-brain, it´s embarrassing enough already."  
  
Ryoga didn´t seem to notice the insult. "In a play, opposite my dear Akane ..." he said, staring away into the distance.  
  
Ranma leaped back up onto the fence. "Yeah, well you´re welcome to my part, pig-boy, I hate having to sing in front of people. Well, be seeing ya, I guess ..."  
  
"Wait." Ryoga called. "You say you have no interest in taking part in the play?"  
  
"You got that right," Ranma nodded. "But Pop says I have to do it, I dunno why, it´s not like he´s into theater or anything, so there´s no use in trying to get me to give you the part."  
  
Ryoga smiled. "Hmph. Well, what if we told your father I had ... this?" he flourished a piece of paper.  
  
"Great," Ranma said, sarcastically. "You feel like telling me what "this" is?"  
  
""This" is a ticket to the annual "all-you-can-eat" buffet for the employees of the Japanese Map company," Ryoga announced, triumphantly.  
  
Ranma blinked. "How come you´ve got a ticket?"  
  
"They send out free tickets to their biggest customers," Ryoga said. "But that´s not the point. I know your father; he´ll do anything for free food. So how about it? You don´t want the part, but I do. Do we have a deal?"  
  
Ranma jumped down from the fence. He took Ryoga´s hand. "Deal," he grinned.  
  
  
  
"Hey, Pop," Ranma yelled, running in the door of the Tendo residence, "I got something for ya."  
  
Genma came into view. What is it, Ranma? he wrote.  
  
Ranma grinned. "I happen to have acquired a ticket to an "all-you-can- eat" buffet," he began.  
  
Genma´s panda eyes widened, and he began to drool. Give it to me!!!!! he wrote, enthusiastically, grabbing his son by the shoulders and shaking him.  
  
"Easy, Pop," Ranma said, shaking himself free. "Sure you can have it ... if you sign your name here," he produced a piece of paper, "on this dotted line right here."  
  
Genma carried on drooling, but he knew his son. He eyed the paper suspiciously. What´s this? he signed.  
  
"Oh, nothing much," Ranma said, innocently, "only a contract saying you agree it´s entirely up to me whether I take part in this stupid school play or not."  
  
Genma grabbed his head in his paws and let out a roar of frustration.  
  
"Just think of the buffet, Pop," Ranma said, slyly. "Think of all the food they´ll have there ... all you can eat ... that´s a lot of ramen ..."  
  
Ganma grabbed Ranma´s contract. Give me that, he signed, furiously signing his name. After all, it´s only a stupid school play, he wrote. Now, where´s that ticket?!  
  
"Pleasure doing business with you, Pop," Ranma said, evilly, as his father snatched the ticket, his eyes gleaming.  
  
  
  
A/N: Haha! Another chapter done! I hope you enjoyed it, I´m starting chapter 3 any day now. Now, remember to REVIEEEEWW and tell me what you think, or if you have any ideas that you´d like to see in this story, or even if you don´t have anything interesting to say at all, coz I LOVE getting your reviews!!!! ^__^ 


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: I´m sorry it took so long to get this chapter up, my computer broke down and ... oh, you don´t wanna hear my excuses. A big THANK YOU to everyone who´s reviewed, I really appreciate it, honest, keep it up!!!, I hope you like this chapter!!!!  
  
  
  
Chapter 3  
  
"YOU WHAT?!" Soun practically screamed, seeming to loom over his friend, the panda.  
  
Signed a contract saying Ranma didn´t have to be in the play, Genma repeated, sullenly, on his sign.  
  
Soun broke down and began sobbing. "What about OUR PLAN??!! You´ve RUINED IT!!!"  
  
"Oh, Father, please don´t tell Mr Saotome off," Kasumi said. "He´s feeling bad enough already. Where did you say you went last night, anyway, Mr Saotome?"  
  
All-you-can-eat buffet, Genma signed. And I rather wish now I hadn´t eaten all I could eat; I really don´t feel well.  
  
"You see, Father?" Kasumi scolded. "And ... what plan is this, anyway?"  
  
"Oh, is that the time?" Soun looked hurriedly at his watch. "I´ve got to go, Kasumi, dear ... very important ... well ... something very important, anyway ..." And he disappeared out of the room.  
  
Kasumi looked back at the panda. "I don´t suppose you know what Father´s talking about, Mr Saotome?"  
  
No idea, the panda signed, hurriedly. Well, I´ll be off to ... to do something ... thank you for the tea ...  
  
Kasumi stared after him. "They´re up to something, aren´t they," Nabiki, her younger sister, said, coming in. Kasumi nodded, slowly. "I think they are."  
  
  
  
"Why are YOU so happy today?" Akane asked, looking up at her fiancée. He was skipping along the wall on his way to school, humming to himself.  
  
He grinned at Akane´s words, jumped down, and produced a piece of paper. "Haha... look at this!"  
  
Akane looked at it. "I, Genma Saotome, hereby aggree that my son, Ranma Saotome, has the right to remain out of the school play if he wishes to ... Signed, Genma Saotome ..." Akane looked up. "So you´re not going to be in the play?"  
  
"Nope," Ranma grinned, but half-heartedly. She sounded almost ... disappointed.  
  
Akane looked down at the note again. "How on earth did you get your father to sign this?"  
  
Ranma looked smug again. "Oh, you know what he´s like about food ... so I bribed ´im with a ticket to an all-you-can-eat buffet! No more stupid play for me!" He jumped back up onto the wall and continued humming.  
  
Akane frowned, angrily. "But ... there isn´t an understudy for you yet! We won´t be able to do the show if you quit! That´s SO typically you, only thinking of yourself -"  
  
"Relax!" Ranma said. "I got someone to do it for me."  
  
Akane looked surprised. "Who?"  
  
"Oh ... Ryoga ..."  
  
Akane sniffed. "And what did you have to bribe HIM with for him to aggree to it?"  
  
Ranma made a face, and then shrugged. "Actually, he wanted to ... I didn´t have to bribe him at all."  
  
Akane smiled. "Good; then maybe HE´LL actually show some interest in what he´s doing." A thought seemed to strike her. "Shampoo won´t be pleased, though ... she´s only in this play because YOU are ..."  
  
Ranma put his hands in his pockets. "No, I guess she won´t be pleased ..."  
  
  
  
"WHAT?!!!"  
  
Mr Huriko cowered away from Shampoo. Shampoo had asked where Ranma was at the practise that evening, and Ranma had been right; she wasn´t at all pleased to hear Ryoga would be taking his place.  
  
"You no can do this!" the Chinese girl screamed, angrily, at the Drama teacher. "Shampoo airen must be in play!"  
  
"I´m sorry, miss Shampoo, but Saotome produced a note from his father," Huriko began.  
  
Shampoo crossed her arms. "If airen no be in play - Shampoo no be in play!" she declared, haughtily.  
  
Huriko straightened up. "But - but you can´t!" he said. "We don´t have an understudy for you; you WERE the understudy, until that unfortunate accident last night-"  
  
Shampoo instantly dropped the haughty attitude. "Yes - very unfortunate accident," she said, innocently. "Shampoo very upset to hear."  
  
"What did you say happened again?"  
  
"Girl that Shampoo understudy suddenly be attacked by mysterious old woman with stick," Shampoo said, sweetly.  
  
"You mean an old GHOUL?" Akane snapped, from back in the class.  
  
Shampoo jumped. She swivelled round to face her. "You be quiet pervert girl!" she snapped back. "You no know what happen!"  
  
Akane stood up. "I can guess," she growled.  
  
"Please, girls," Huriko moaned. "Settle down. Ryoga Hikibi here," he indicated Ryoga, "has kindly offered to take Mr Saotome´s place in the play, and you, miss Shampoo, will be Carlotta -"  
  
"Carlotta" jerked back to the Drama teacher. "Shampoo say she no be in play if airen no be in play!" she shouted again. "You make airen come back and send pig boy home or you no have any Carlotta!"  
  
Huriko sweat-dropped. "Now, now, miss Shampoo," he said, patting her carefully on the shoulder, "there´s no need to get upset, we can´t do the play without having someone play Carlotta, and you really have a lovely voice -"  
  
"SHAMPOO NO UPSET!" the Amazon girl screamed. "Shampoo say she no be in play until teacher man make airen come back, and Shampoo no change her mind!"  
  
And with that, she stormed out of the classroom, slamming the door behind her. The silence that followed seemed to ring loudly.  
  
Mr Huriko fell to his knees. "I give up!" he cried. "The role of Carlotta is essential to the play! We can´t do the Phantom of the Opera without Carlotta!" He seemed to calm down a bit. "And we can´t have Carlotta without Mr Saotome, it seems," he sighed. "Very well; it seems we´ll have to convince Saotome to come back, or we have no play."  
  
  
  
Ranma shook his head. "Uh-uh. No way!"  
  
Akane stamped her foot. It was later that evening. Mr Huriko had declared Akane was to convince Ranma to at least come and understudy Ryoga. But that was not going well. "Ranma, you jerk!" she shouted. "We can´t do the play if you don´t! That stupid Shampoo refuses to be in it if you´re not, and she´s Carlotta after that little "accident" the girl she was understudying had. If we don´t have Carlotta we CAN´T DO THE PLAY!"  
  
Ranma pulled a face. "See if I care!"  
  
Akane was fuming by now. "Ranma! How can you be so SELFISH?!" she shouted, whacking him across the head.  
  
"Ow!" Ranma rubbed it. "Look, Pop signed the note, I don´t have to do it if I don´t wanna, so quit yellin´," he cried.  
  
I signed a note saying you didn´t have to be in the play itself. Mr Saotome had entered the room. If you´re an understudy you´re not actually in the play, are you?  
  
"That´s right," Akane said. "No-one´s actually expecting you to get up on stage; you´re just there as bait for Shampoo."  
  
"What the -" Ranma sputtered. "BAIT? What am I, a worm?"  
  
Akane tilted her head. "You could put it like that. Ryoga´s the one who´ll be doing all the work." She smiled. "And I bet he´ll do it a lot better than you could, anyway. We sung over a couple of songs today," she went on, "and I didn´t realise he could sing, but he can! You should have heard him -"  
  
"Oh, really?!" Ranma snapped. "All right; I´ll show you I´m as good - no, better - than Ryoga." He stomped over to her bag, and began rummaging in it.  
  
Akane tore it away from him. "What do you think you´re doing?!" she shouted.  
  
"Findin´ your script!" Ranma shouted back. "If I´m going to understudy RAOUL in this stoopid play I´d better read the damn thing, hadn´t I?"  
  
Akane clapped her hands together. "Oh - so - you´ll do it, then?" she exclaimed, happily.  
  
Ranma looked sulky. "Sure," he muttered. "But only to prove I can do it just as well as Ryoga could," he added, angrily, snatching the script from Akane and stomping off to the room he shared with his father.  
  
  
  
"....help me make the music of the ... NIIIIIIGHT!" Kuno concluded his solo, dramatically.  
  
"Thank you, Kuno! Very good!" Mr Huriko beamed. "All right, everyone, we´re doing well, take a break."  
  
The people exited the stage in various directions. The members of the school orchestra put down their instruments and began talking.  
  
"Okay, Kuno, you can put me down now," Akane growled at the older boy, who was still holding her.  
  
"Ah, fair Akane," Kuno, who obviously missed the dangerous edge to her voice, sighed. "Together, we make the perfect pair! If only the play ended differently ... if only Christine did not turn her loving Phantom away in so cruel a fashion ..."  
  
"Put me down NOW, Kuno," Akane snapped, louder this time. She glanced out at the seats. There was Ranma, sitting with the other understudies. Shampoo had wasted no time in leaping into his lap, and was sitting there, her arms wrapped around his neck.  
  
"Shampoo so happy Ranma come be in play with her!" the Chinese girl squealed. "She know Ranma love her too much for him walk out on her!"  
  
"Whatever, Shampoo," Ranma muttered. Kuno was still holding Akane ...  
  
Shampoo squeezed him round the neck, almost cutting off his circulation. "You no worry, airen," she said. "Shampoo be Christine girl and Ranma be Raoul boy at big show, Shampoo promise ..."  
  
Ranma turned to look at her. "Uh, Shampoo ... whaddya mean?"  
  
Shampoo just beamed at him.  
  
Ranma pushed her off his lap and into the next seat. "All right, Shampoo, I know that look. What are you plannin´ to do this time?"  
  
Shampoo was already back on his lap. "Shampoo no plan," she smiled innocently. "You I love," she added, changing the subject.  
  
Mr Huriko clapped his hands. "All right, people, places! We´ll take it from "Poor fool"."  
  
Shampoo jumped to her feet, much to Ranma´s relief. "Shampoo go now," she called, over her shoulder. "Shampoo sing now very good for Ranma ..."  
  
Ranma sighed, and folded his arms. He was still worried about what Shampoo had said ... what did she have planned THIS time?  
  
Ranma watched as the others began rehearsing again. Shampoo DID sing well, and - he grinned - the character suited her. Kuno ... ah, he was all right ... a bit over-enthusiastic about the whole thing, though ... Ryoga ... Akane was right, he DID have quite a good voice, Ranma had to admit, despite himself. As for Akane ... He glanced at her. She was a good actress; she managed to look genuinely frightened as the fake body was tossed out onto the stage. And there she went, calling for RAOUL ...  
  
Ranma glanced at his watch as they began "All I Ask of You". He didn´t really like this one ...  
  
He sniffed, almost inaudibly, as they neared the end of the song. Ryoga looked positively ecstatic to be doing a song like this with Akane. Heh. Well good for him. At least that meant Ranma didn´t have to do such a stupid song ... He pretended not to notice the angry twinge in his stomach as Ryoga and Akane (It´s just a play, stupid! It´s not really them! It´s Raoul and Christine!) kissed at the end. Good job it didn´t have to be HIM doing that ...he was glad ... yeah ... ´course ...  
  
  
  
A/N: Well that´s another chapter finished! Thanx for reading this far, I hope you liked it; if you did, REVIEW!!! and tell me. If you didn´t, REVIEW!!! and tell me. If you have an idea, REVIEW!!! and tell me. If ... Well, you get the idea. Anyway, I´ll start chapter 4 soon, see ya then! PS. Big prize for anyone (well, you can imagine me applauding for you, anyway ^_^,) who recognizes the scene from PotO in this chapter!!! 


	4. Chapter 4

HIYA!!! Here´s Chapter 4, I hope you like it. I haven´t been getting enough reviews lately, so PLEEEAAAASE review if you want to see another chapter .  
  
Chapter 4  
  
"All right, that´s it for today, everyone!" Huriko called, as they finished the scene. "I´ll see you again tomorrow evening!"  
  
Ranma plodded home along the fence, not waiting for Akane. He looked back just as he turned the corner, and saw she was just coming out of the school. She was laughing at something Ryoga had just said.  
  
Akane looked up and saw Ranma standing at the corner of the fence. "Hey, Ranma-" she called, starting towards him, but he had already turned and carried on home at a brisk jog. She shrugged. Fine, if he didn´t want to walk with her ...  
  
She laughed, and ran to Ryoga, who was barely out the door of the school when he was heading in the wrong direction. "Ryoga ... it´s this way ..."  
  
  
  
"Ranma, are you feeling all right?" Kasumi asked, worriedly. Ranma was only just picking at his second helpings at dinner. Usually, he would be onto fourth helpings by now.  
  
Well if he doesn´t want it ... Genma signed, eyeing the plate greedily.  
  
"I´m fine," Ranma muttered. He began eating again. P-CHAN was sitting in Akane´s lap, being fed by her. The little "piglet" was looking unusually contented, even for himself. Ranma knew why that was. Ryoga had been on cloud nine ever since he´d got the part in that STUPID play. Stoopid play, Ranma thought, darkly. Plays were a lot more trouble than they were worth, in HIS opinion.  
  
Akane looked up. "Ranma, would you stop glaring at P-Chan," she snapped. "What´s wrong with you tonight?" She hugged the little black pig.  
  
Ranma stood up. "I´m not hungry," he declared. Genma swiped the discarded plate as he left the kitchen.  
  
The Tendo family stared after him. "Oh, my," Kasumi said (much to everyone´s surprise). "He ... didn´t even finish his second helpings? Do you think he´s ill, Mr Saotome?"  
  
He´s fine. It was a mystery how Genma managed to hold up a sign and eat from both his AND Ranma´s plate at the same time. Don´t worry about him.  
  
  
  
  
  
"Oops, didn´t see ya, "P-Chan"," Ranma said, sarcastically.  
  
The piglet´s angry squeal as Ranma bumped his foot against it/kicked it drew Akane´s attention. She came out of her room into the hall and snatched the pig up.  
  
"Ranma!" she exclaimed, angrily. "Stop being so mean to P-Chan! First you glare at him all through dinner, and now you keep hurting him! Look, he´s scared stiff of you!" She glanced down at P-Chan, who instantly stopped poking out his tongue at Ranma and put on a hurt, sorrowful look. "See?" she said, looking up again. The pig´s sorrowful look instantly snapped back into a poked-out tongue.  
  
Ranma stuffed his hands in his pockets. "It´s the pig´s own fault; it keeps gettin´ in my way," he muttered.  
  
Akane made a face at him. "I know this is still about the play," she snapped. "Stop sulking about having to do something you don´t want to do for once, or at least stop taking it out on P-Chan!" She stomped back into her room, slamming the door behind her.  
  
"I am NOT sulking!" Ranma shouted after her. "Stoopid tomboy," he muttered, heading for his own room. "Stoopid Ryoga ... and STOOPID play ..."  
  
  
  
Mr Huriko stared down at the figure in front of him at the practise the next evening. "And who are you, ghoul?"  
  
"Who are you calling a ghoul?" the old woman snapped up at him.  
  
"Is Shampoo great-grandmother," Shampoo smiled, sweetly.  
  
Huriko groaned, inwardly. "And ... what did you say you had in mind, Miss Shampoo?"  
  
"Shampoo hear about other terrible accident that girl who understudy mallet g - Akane - have last night," Shampoo said. "Shampoo be understudy for her now she no have one."  
  
"Yes ... another accident with a mysterious old woman with a stick," Huriko said, slowly. He looked at Shampoo´s great-grandmother, a little old woman with a stick, but saw the look on her face and decided not to comment. "But ... Miss Shampoo," he continued, "you are already cast as Carlotta. If, in the unlikely event that Miss Tendo would not be in the play, we wouldn´t have a Carlotta."  
  
Shampoo beamed. "Oh, Shampoo already think of that!" she said. "That why she bring great-grandmother! Great-grandmother understudy Shampoo as Carlotta lady!"  
  
Huriko looked at Cologne again, trying to imagine the shrivelled-up old woman as the diva Carlotta. "But ..." he began, "but ... this IS supposed to be a SCHOOL play ... with ... um ...you know ... young people ..." he trailed off.  
  
"Are you saying," the old woman began menacingly, "Are you saying that I look OLD?!"  
  
"Nnnononononono," Huriko sputtered. He had a nasty feeling that yet another accident involving an old woman with a stick was looming up ahead in HIS future. "But ... um ... you must admit that you are ... er ... perhaps a little older than most of the others ..."  
  
Shampoo crossed her arms. Not again, Huriko thought, desperately. "Teacher man do what Shampoo say or -" she began, loudly.  
  
"Yes, I know, I know," Huriko interrupted, desperately. "Or you´ll refuse to be in the play." He sighed. "All right, then ... we´d better get your great-grandmother a script, and Miss Shampoo, you´d better learn the role of Christine as well as yours."  
  
Shampoo´s temper evaporated instantly. "Oh, you very nice teacher man!" she exclaimed, happily. "Shampoo go get script for Great-grandmother ..." And they were gone.  
  
Huriko collapsed. "What a diva ..." he groaned.  
  
  
  
"WHAT?!"  
  
Akane was, to put it lightly, distressed to find out who her new understudy was. "But - but Mr Huriko," she protested, glaring at Shampoo, "I thought she was going to be Carlotta! She can´t be my understudy as WELL!"  
  
Huriko wiped his brow. "Please, Miss Tendo, it´s complicated, but - um, in the current circumstances -"  
  
"Oh." Akane crossed her arms and turned to the Chinese Amazon girl. "I guess you threatened him ´till he gave up, huh? You and your "mysterious old woman with a stick"-"  
  
"You stay out of this, pervert girl!" Shampoo growled. "Was very unfortunate accident and Shampoo very upset to hear!" she snapped. "Was no Shampoo fault and Shampoo only want help because she NICE girl, no like girl who hit peoples with mallet all of time -"  
  
"OH REALLY!" Akane growled. "Well at least I don't go around poisoning people with various potions -"  
  
Shampoo sniffed. "Shampoo hear mallet girl cooking taste poison anyway," she snapped.  
  
"Girls!" Huriko cried, desperately throwing himself between them before Akane could lunge herself at Shampoo. "Please! I beg you! Save the fighting until after the practise for once!" He stepped back. "Now; Miss Shampoo will be your understudy, Miss Tendo, as well as being Carlotta, and that's final. Do we all agree, Tendo?"  
  
Akane carried on glaring at Shampoo, but nodded, sulkily. Shampoo stuck out her tongue at her, gleefully.  
  
"Well then," Mr Huriko said, loudly. "Shall we begin the rehearsal?"  
  
"Well, well, groom; Shampoo said you would be here."  
  
Ranma froze. He spun round. "What're you doin´ here, old ghoul?" he sputtered. "Shouldn´t´ya be off plottin´ to get me to marry Shampoo or somethin´?"  
  
Cologne grinned. "Aha . I am here to be in the play," she said, smugly. "I am my Shampoo's understudy."  
  
Ranma crossed his arms. "So I guess this is part of your latest plot, huh?" he sighed. "What're ya gonna do this time?"  
  
"Hehehehehe," Cologne cackled, "wait and see, groom." And she headed off towards her granddaughter.  
  
Ranma sighed and headed for the seats. This place just kept getting better and better.  
  
"All right, people," Huriko called, from up on the stage, "we'll take it from the beginning of Act 2 ."  
  
Ranma sat, watching the practise, listening to Cologne muttering as she began memorizing the part of Carlotta. He had a feeling things could only go downhill from here .  
  
  
  
A/N: And that's another chapter finished! By the way, I can't believe you've all stopped reading my story! Have you forgotten me . sniff . (Begins flowing in Soun-style tears) I've hardly had ANY reviews . if you want to know how it all ends (yes, I've got down the plot for the last few chapters now!) you'll have to review harder, people . (Brightens) Anyway, THANK YOU to those of you who HAVE reviewed, I REALLY appreciate it, keep it up! Talhonjik. 


	5. Chapter 5

THANK YOU everybody who´s reviewed, keep it up, guys, I luv ya for it!!! (Bear-hugs everyone who´s reviewed) And I also love getting your e-mails, thanx! OK, that´s enough from me, on with the story!  
  
(A/N:) Chapter 5 (this one) happens about a month after chapter 4 (the last one).  
  
  
  
Everyone in the audience held their breath as the two neared the end of their duet. The spotlights shone brightly on them, sparkling off the sequins on Akane´s beautiful Christine costume. She opened her mouth and sang beautifully as she looked warmly into the bright, smiling eyes of her partner:  
  
"Say you´ll share with me one love, one lifetime; say the word and I will follow you, share each day with me, each night, each morning; say you love me;"  
  
Her partner seemed almost to mean it really as he replied, passionately:  
  
"You know I do;"  
  
They took each other´s hands, smiling; the audience had disappeared, and it was only them now, singing for each other:  
  
"Love me; that´s all I ask of you ..."  
  
She closed her eyes. The music played somewhere in the distance as he kissed her, warmly, bending her back softly.  
  
"Anywhere you go let me go too; love me; that´s all I ask of you!"  
  
The audience was back now, applauding and cheering madly for them. They bowed, and he held her as they smiled out towards the audience. The end of his pig-tail tickled her ear as she leant up against his shoulder ...  
  
  
  
Akane opened her eyes, sleepily. The sun, coming in through the window, was shining in her eyes. She hugged her pillow as she rolled over, wanting to get back to sleep ... she had been having such a good dream ... But someone banged on her door before she could fall asleep again.  
  
"Hey, Akane!" Nabiki called, through the door. "You might want to think about getting up soon; don´t you have that final practise this morning?"  
  
Akane sat up. "Yeah, Nabiki, I'm up," she yawned. Yeah, today was the day before the big performance, wasn't it ... She stretched and got out of bed.  
  
As she got dressed she tried to remember the dream she had been having before she woke up. It had been something good, she was sure .  
  
  
  
Akane thought about the show tomorrow night as she walked along the road towards the school. She wasn't nervous . not at all . well, maybe just a bit; but they'd been practising for more than a month now, and everything had gone pretty well so far. Being held by Kuno several times a day might be pretty disgusting, but she put up with it for the play. And Ryoga was such a nice guy . she couldn't think of anyone who'd make a better Raoul. She suddenly felt reminded of her dream, but still couldn't remember it properly. Something about the play? . She involuntarily glanced up at Ranma. He still sported the bruises she'd given him this morning.  
  
She sniffed and looked away again. It was his own fault; because it was Saturday, not even the usual bucket of cold water had been able to wake him up. So she'd had to resort to The Mallet.  
  
"Uh . Akane?" she looked up again. "Yeah?" she replied.  
  
Ranma looked up at the sky. "So . you nervous? ´Bout the show tomorrow, I mean."  
  
Akane sniffed. "Nah," she said, confidently. "I mean . not really - not a lot," she added, a little less sure of herself.  
  
"Hey - you'll do great," Ranma said, assuringly. Akane looked up, surprised. Ranma looked back up at the sky. "I mean - after all the practising we've done, even a klutz like YOU couldn't mess up - hey!" A lightning-quick leap into the air only just saved him from being malleted the rest of the way to the school.  
  
Something suddenly whooshed through the air. "Akane watch out!" Ranma cried, jumping down and knocking her out of the way, just as something hit the ground hard where she had been standing. Akane got up, brushing the dirt off her clothes. "You!" she growled.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry, girl, didn't see you standing there ." Cologne sneered, dislodging her stick from the crack it had made in the ground where it hit. "You take care now, we wouldn't want you having an accident before the big night ." And she bounded off again.  
  
"That old ghoul!" Akane fumed. "She's been out to get me all week now! "We wouldn't want you having an accident ." Hah! I'll show her! She won't get me with her stupid tricks ." and she marched off towards the school again.  
  
  
  
  
  
It was much later in the evening when Huriko clapped his hands as they finished the scene. "That's it, people, we'll call it a day!" There were tired-sounding cheers from a few people. "Now, go home, rest, relax, and I'll see you again tomorrow evening!"  
  
Ranma staggered out of the school. Cologne and Shampoo had spared no effort in trying to get Akane. Sandbags, scenery, chandeliers and old women with sticks had dropped towards her from all around, things had mysteriously "slipped" out of Shampoo's hands in a way that they whizzed through the air towards the leading girl, there had been a remarkable amount of loose/broken floorboards cropping up wherever Akane was supposed to step next . Ranma silently marvelled at their imagination. Although Akane had realised she had to be careful, and had managed to defend herself most times, he had still been constantly on the run trying to catch stray pieces of scenery as they whizzed through the air towards his fiancée.  
  
Ranma groaned, rubbing one of the bruises he had got from a sandbag, and staggered off home along the fence.  
  
  
  
"That went really well, didn't it?" Akane asked, as she and Ryoga walked down the steps of the school. "Apart from Cologne and Shampoo attempting to kill me, of course ."  
  
Ryoga nodded. "Yeah. You - you make a really good Christine, Akane," he added, nervously.  
  
Akane smiled. "You think so? Thanks," she said, happily. "You're really good at your part, too."  
  
Ryoga stopped at the bottom of the steps. It's now or never, he thought to himself. Tell her now. "Um - Akane -" he began.  
  
"Sweet Akane!"  
  
"Go away, Kuno," Akane growled, trying to shake off his enthusiastic embrace.  
  
"You need not hide your feelings for me, sweet Akane," the older boy cried, as usually somehow managing to miss her murderous tone. "Join me on a midnight stroll, my love, for I have composed a glorious poem to -"  
  
Kuno flew off into the black night sky courtesy Akane´s Mallet.  
  
"Geez, I wish that guy´d just leave me alone for once!" Akane fumed, starting off down the school steps. She turned round and waved, smiling, at Ryoga. "Good night, Ryoga! See you tomorrow night!"  
  
"Uh. yeah . bye," Ryoga called after her. He sighed, and headed off to try and find some cold water so he could go after her as "P-Chan".  
  
Tomorrow night, he thought to himself, determinedly, I WILL tell her! And then, he sighed, again, imagining the scene, I'll finally ask her out!  
  
The eternally lost pig-boy walked off into the night, thinking about his plans for tomorrow night.  
  
  
  
Meanwhile, Kuno´s flight was coming to an end. With a loud thud, he hit a roof. The now-battered kendoist sighed. "Ah, beauteous Akane," he said, to himself, "how passionate is your love! May I forever bear these scars, a symbol of your affection!"  
  
Another "scar" was added to his already considerable collection as a small woman on a stick bounded over him, closely followed by a girl on a bicycle, both of them landing on the road below.  
  
Even someone with Kuno´s intelligence would wonder who would ride a bike on a roof. The battered kendoist listened as they talked.  
  
"Is too bad Shampoo no get mallet girl," the Amazon fumed. "She try so hard today. she only obstacle in Shampoo way of be in play with airen!"  
  
"Don't worry, Granddaughter," Cologne said, soothingly. "We'll get her tomorrow evening, I promise you, and you will play against son-in-law in her place."  
  
Shampoo beamed. "Airen see how Shampoo better than pervert girl at being nice fiancée, and then he love only Shampoo!"  
  
"There is one thing, though," the old ghoul said, thoughtfully. "Son-in- law isn't actually in the play yet."  
  
Shampoo grinned. "Shampoo take care of pig-boy," she said. "She put water on him, and then he be little piggy! Little piggy no can be in play, and then airen must be Raoul-boy instead! But," she frowned, "mallet-girl be problem . Shampoo can no pour water on her ."  
  
"I told you, Shampoo dear, we'll take care of her!" the old woman said, again. At this, she was interrupted by a figure leaping off the roof towards her.  
  
"Foul fiend!" Kuno shouted, hysterically, "I will not allow you to plot against sweet Akane in so cruel a fashion! Prepare to d -"  
  
A quick blow on the head with a stick cut him off abruptly.  
  
Shampoo looked down at the unconscious boy. She shrugged. "Is only silly Phantom-boy," she said. "He always shout like that." She turned away from him. "We go home now, Great-Grandmother," she said, cheerfully, leaping onto her bike. And they went off, leaving the boy in the street.  
  
Kuno opened his eyes, and spat out some dirt. "Foul fiend," he muttered, "I will foil your most devious plan!" He got up. "Dearest Akane," he said, to himself, "I shall not allow this fiend to bring harm to you! I, Tatewaki Kuno, shall protect you with my life!"  
  
"Hey, keep it down out there!" someone shouted from a nearby window.  
  
"Fool!" Kuno cried back. He was really getting going now. "It is not you to whom I pledge my love!"  
  
He ran off into the night, still shouting about his intended valiant rescue of "fair Akane".  
  
  
  
"A brilliant plot!"  
  
"Indeed, Saotome! Quite ingenious!"  
  
Ranma groaned. The first words he had heard as he entered the house were not promising. He entered the sitting room, and saw his father and Mr Tendo shaking hands, looking very pleased with themselves.  
  
Ranma sighed, and crossed his arms. "Okay, Pop, what´re you guys plottin´ now."  
  
Mr Saotome, human for once, tried to look surprised. "Plotting? ."  
  
Mr Tendo tried to look equally shocked. "Us?!"  
  
Ranma groaned. "Look, I can´t be bothered right now to force it out of ya, Pop. But I'm warnin´ ya, if I wake up dressed in a tux in a church tomorrow mornin´ I'm makin´ sure AKANE cooks your breakfast for the next week." He was going to head upstairs, but was met as he turned around, by a very familiar-looking mallet.  
  
"How dare he say that about my cooking AGAIN?!" Akane, who had just come in, raged, as she headed upstairs.  
  
The two fathers looked at each other. "The plan goes as agreed, then, I presume?" Genma said, shifting so the light rain didn't fall on him through the newly-made hole in the roof.  
  
"Indeed it does, Saotome," Soun said, smugly.  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: Finally done!!!! Now, first I'd like to say, R/A fans, don't flame me just yet, I know Akane´s being friendly with Ryoga, but just read the last chapters (I'll have them up soon!) and THEN decide whether to flame me or not; I do NOT support Ryoga/Akane, I´m giving you that! Neway remember to REVIEW!!!!!! And let me know what you think before you go, it´s the only way you´ll get the next chapter, C ya then (hopefully!), Talhonjik. 


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: AH! THANK YOU, oh WONDERFUL people, that have read and reviewed my lowly story!!! If you want to e-mail me or anything, you know where to find the address, I love hearing from you! Anyway, I guess you´re tired of me prattling on, here's chapter 6!  
  
Chapter 6  
  
"Hurry, Ranma! We're late!" Akane dragged Ranma into the school.  
  
The big night was finally here. Akane had claimed all day that she wasn't nervous, but had been even more short-tempered than usually, and Ranma had seen the wrong end of a mallet more times than even he was used to. And it had not helped that on the way to the school they had been waylaid by Kodachi, who had chosen TONIGHT of all nights to again attempt to claim her "darling Ranma". They were indeed late.  
  
"Miss Tendo!"  
  
Huriko came running towards her, mopping his brow. "There you are!" he puffed. "Thank god, at least ONE of you is here . You haven't seen Ryoga, by any chance?" he added, tensely.  
  
Akane looked worried. "No," she replied. "Isn't he here yet?"  
  
"Ah, he'll turn up, you know what he's like," Ranma said, casually.  
  
"I hope so," Huriko muttered. "Well, you'd better go and get ready, Miss Tendo, the curtain goes up in half an hour ." he added, rushing off to see to something else.  
  
Akane jumped. "Yeah, I'd better get dressed," she said, heading off towards the changing rooms.  
  
  
  
Someone watched her go.  
  
"Mallet-girl here, Great-Grandmother," Shampoo said, looking round at the old woman.  
  
"Good." Cologne nodded. "You wait here with the cold water for the pig- boy Hibiki, and I'll take care of the girl." Cologne held up a small bottle. "This potion will put her to sleep for at least six hours," she grinned, evilly. "One sniff of this and her part is yours, Granddaughter."  
  
  
  
Kuno had already got his costume on, and was muttering to himself as he walked. "The foul fiend plotted her wicked plan to strike against my dearest Akane this evening. I must take action to keep my love from harms´ way! Monstrous ghoul, you shall indeed not prevail!!"  
  
The kendoist ran down the hall. "Sweet Akane, I come anon! Do not fear, for I - Oomph!" Kuno, by now outside Akane´s dressing room, crashed into something coming the other way at a similar speed. He looked down.  
  
"´Tis you, foul fiend!" he exclaimed.  
  
Cologne gave him a slow, evil stare. "Look . what you made me do . clumsy boy ..." she muttered, before falling to the floor, snoring.  
  
Kuno stared down at the old ghoul, and at the bottle she was holding. Its contents had splashed into her face when he had crashed into her.  
  
"Aha!" the boy exclaimed, instantly coming to a conclusion. "And do not attempt to challenge the mighty Tatewaki Kuno again, old fiend!"  
  
Ranma came round the corner. "Yo, Kuno -" he began. He looked down at the snoring old woman on the floor. "Hey . old ghoul!" he said, poking her with his foot. She did not wake up. Ranma looked up at Kuno. "What happened . you read your poetry for her or somethin´?"  
  
"Do not mock the powerful Kuno!" the boy exclaimed, smugly. "For behold; upon seeing my wrath, the old fiend has fainted from sheer terror! Do not let the same fate befall you, cad!"  
  
"Uh, yeah . whatever, Kuno," Ranma said, absent-mindedly. He bent down to examine the old woman. He picked up the bottle. "Must be one of her Chinese potions," he muttered, examining the label. He looked up, noticing that they were just outside Akane´s changing room.  
  
"Hey, look, Kuno!" he exclaimed, falsely. "Isn't that the pig-tailed girl over there?!" he pointed down the hall.  
  
"What?!" Kuno immediately stopped the detailed description of his victory over the old ghoul. "Where?" He bounded off in the direction Ranma had pointed in. "Oh, pig-tailed girl!"  
  
"What a loser," Ranma muttered, shaking his head. "I guess I'd better make sure the old hag didn't get Akane with whatever was in the bottle ." He put it down and went up to the dressing-room door. "Hey, Akane!" he called, knocking on the door. "Can I come in?"  
  
"Yeah," she replied.  
  
Ranma opened the door. "Yo, Akane, I found the old ghoul with this bottle outside and-" He stopped. He'd forgotten what he had been meaning to say next.  
  
Akane was wearing a beautiful white dress, all sequins and lace. It had quite a low neck, though not overly revealing, and it reached down to the floor. It rustled when she moved. She looks so . pretty . in that, Ranma thought, dazedly. He blinked. Where had that thought come from? This was Akane, the uncute tomboy . but .wow .  
  
Akane noticed him staring, and frowned. "Ranma, are you all right?" she asked.  
  
Come on, say something, say something! "Uh . yeah ." Come on, Ranma, what's the matter with you?! "Um . Cologne hasn´t been in here, has she?" he managed.  
  
Akane blinked. "Nope," she replied. "Why?"  
  
"Just . I found her asleep outside the door . she had a bottle, I think it might have been a sleepin´ potion, only she banged into Kuno and got it on herself instead."  
  
She IS cute, isn't she . No! She is NOT! Shaddup! But she is, and you know it . Ranma pretended not to hear the annoying little voice in his head.  
  
"Oh," Akane said. She sniffed. "Well, serve her right, she's been after me all week! Miserable old ghoul ."  
  
"Um . is that the dress you're gonna be wearing in the play?" Ranma asked, indicating the white gown.  
  
Akane smiled. "Uh . one of them, yeah," she said, looking down at it. "This one's the one I have to wear in the second scene, you know, when the Phantom kidnaps Christine, but I wanted to try it on . You like it?" she added, uncharacteristically girlish as she twirled round, showing it off.  
  
"Uh ." Ranma tried to think of something clever to say. ´You look absolutely amazing in that´ wasn't exactly his style. "I guess . Very girlie . not very you ."  
  
Akane´s eyes narrowed. "What do you mean, Ranma?" she said, a dangerous tone to her voice.  
  
Ranma backed up against the door. "I -" he began, expecting yet another intimate meeting with Akane´s Mallet. Geez, why'd she always think he was insulting her?  
  
He was saved by a desperate hammering on the door. "Saotome!" Mr Huriko shouted, as he crashed through the doorway. "Are you in there?"  
  
Ranma pushed the door, that had squashed him up against the wall as Huriko flung it open, back. "Um . yeah," he replied. "What?"  
  
"Mr Hibiki appears not to be coming," Mr Huriko said, desperately. "Go and get changed, Saotome; curtain up in fifteen minutes."  
  
Ranma blinked. "´Scuse me?" he said, a panicky edge to his voice. "Get changed? You - you don't mean -"  
  
Huriko nodded. "I'm afraid you'll have to take his role."  
  
Ranma´s eyes widened. "NO WAY!!" he shouted, and made to dash to the door, but Akane and Mr Huriko grabbed him before he could make it. "There's no-one else that can do it, you jerk!" Akane fumed. "If you chicken out we'll have to cancel the whole thing!"  
  
Ranma hesitated in his desperate scrambling for the door. "But -" he began.  
  
"You do know the part, don't you, Saotome?" Huriko asked.  
  
"Uh . yeah . I guess ." Ranma muttered. His father had made sure he practised it every evening after his workout until he knew it off by heart. "But I never thought I'd actually have to do it on stage ." he whined.  
  
"Well you should have been prepared for that, you knew Ryoga sometimes goes missing for weeks," Akane sniffed.  
  
"But he's not missed a single practise!" Ranma protested, but seemed to be settling down by now. "He's not got lost - well, not seriously, there was that one time when they found him over in the next town - but apart from that he's not got lost once for a whole month! I thought he'd be able to keep it up for one more night!"  
  
"Well, he's not here now, and there's not much we can do about it," Huriko sighed. "You'd better get ready, Saotome."  
  
Ranma swallowed. "Okay. But only ´till Ryoga comes back," he added. "I bet he'll turn up any minute. Any minute now ."  
  
Akane sighed. "I wonder where he is this time," she said, to herself.  
  
  
  
Ryoga jogged along the busy street. He checked his watch. "Better hurry . don't wanna be late for the show," he smiled to himself as he ran. "Oof! Oh, sorry sir, didn´t see you ." he stared slightly at two men in front of him.  
  
They were both dressed up in strange clothes. Both wore large, dark sunglasses. One was quite tall, a moustache sticking out from under the glasses and the woolly hat. The other was very short and very fat. He was dressed from head to toe. Ryoga couldn't be sure for all the clothes, but it looked like he had . paws .  
  
"Not to worry, son," the taller man said, his voice muffled by the scarf he had wrapped around his face.  
  
"Um . I'll get going, then ." Ryoga said, trying not to stare.  
  
"Wait!" the tall man said. "Say . aren't you the boy who's going to be in that play over at Furinkhan tonight?"  
  
"Um . yeah ." Ryoga said, slowly, puzzled. "How do you-"  
  
"You're heading the wrong way then, son," the man continued, in a friendly voice. "Furinkhan´s THAT way." He pointed in the direction Ryoga had been coming from. "A LONG way that way," he added, cheerfully.  
  
"Oh," Ryoga said, gratefully. "Thanks; I often get lost ." he turned round the way he had been coming from. It was a good job these two men had told him the right way; otherwise he might not get to the school in time . Ryoga turned round and waved to the two men. "Thanks again," he called.  
  
you're welcome.  
  
Ryoga walked on a couple of steps before frowning. Had the small, fat man just held up . a sign? He glanced back again. He blinked. The two men had gone. Ryoga scratched his head. Well . better carry on; don't want to be late for the play, he thought, cheerfully, and carried on down the street.  
  
  
  
Shampoo lurked in the shadows by the stage door. By now, she thought happily to herself, her Great-Grandmother would have got that horrible pervert-girl who called herself Ranma´s fiancée . And serve her right! Now, all she needed to do was wait for the pig-boy, and everything would be going the way they had planned it .  
  
Shampoo sighed, impatiently. Where was he?  
  
"Miss Shampoo!"  
  
Shampoo jumped, almost dropping her bucket of cold water, which she quickly hid behind her back. "What is it mister teacher man?" she said, sweetly.  
  
"What on earth are you doing out here?" Huriko practically screamed. "The show starts in ten minutes! Why aren't you in your costume?"  
  
Shampoo blinked. "Err . Shampoo . Shampoo not know what time is!" she said, quickly.  
  
Huriko waited. "Well?" he prompted.  
  
"Well what mister teacher man?" Where WAS the pig-boy?!  
  
Huriko was almost in tears. "Well please go and get your costume on and get out onto the stage! Hibiki´s disappeared, Saotome´s likely to disappear as well if we take our eyes off him, Carlotta hasn't got her costume on . All we really properly have is a Christine!"  
  
Shampoo blinked. "Mall- Akane-girl all right?" she asked.  
  
"Yes, and I do believe she's the only one," Huriko muttered, not noticing Shampoo's expression. "Now; PLEASE go and get your costume on, Miss Shampoo."  
  
Shampoo stomped off towards the changing rooms. What could have gone wrong? she wondered. Why hadn´t her great-grandmother done what she had been going to do? "Oh! Nihao, Ranma!" the Chinese girl exclaimed, as she bumped into him. "Oh ." she hesitated, "Shampoo sorry . must go now ." and she ran on.  
  
Ranma looked down at his Raoul costume, now wet from Shampoo's bucket; she had, for some reason, been carrying one, and the water had splashed out as she bumped into him. "Great," he muttered, and froze, noticing his voice.  
  
The water had been cold.  
  
"All right, places for the first scene, everyone!" Huriko cried from somewhere down the hall.  
  
"Oh, man," Ranma hissed.  
  
  
  
  
  
A/N: Ooooh . a cliffhanger! *Grins nervously* I'm sorry, I couldn't help myself . I'm already doing really well with chapter 7, I'll try to hurry up with it, I know I hate cliffhangers . Aaaaanyway, remember to REVIEW, people, it's the only way I know there's someone out there that actually LIKES my stuff . you people have been REALLY great about reviewing me, I love ya! Peace!! Talhonjik. 


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